


Singing the Shovel Song

by Erikthonius



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-20
Updated: 2018-12-30
Packaged: 2019-04-25 09:53:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14376312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Erikthonius/pseuds/Erikthonius
Summary: The Apollo cabin can look after its own





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own the characters. They were created by Rick Riordan. I do not own the lyrics. They were created by William Gilbert, Henri Meilhac, Ludovic Halévy, and Cesare Sterbini.

Jason Grace, son of Jupiter, pontifex maximus of Camp Jupiter and Camp Half-Blood, was feeling protective of his friend. Nico had gone through more hardship, more sorrow than any demigod, even a child of the Big Three, should have to face in a lifetime, let alone the fifteen or so years that he’d lived. The fact that he was coming to terms with his sexuality was a good thing; he even had a boyfriend, but was that boyfriend good enough for him? Jason intended to find out, in a friendly way, of course, but he felt he did have a duty to his friend.

“I think I’ll head over to Cabin Seven and have a chat with Will, you know, get to know him a little better,” he said to his girlfriend, Piper.

“Jason, don’t do this,” she chided. “You’re not doing Nico or yourself any favors.”

“Oh, babe, it’s not like that,” he replied. “I just want to clear the air, you know?”

She could see that nothing she could say would stop him, so she just waved him off, rolling her eyes and waiting for the inevitable.

Jason was about halfway to the Apollo cabin when an arrow seemed to sprout from the path in front of him. He froze in his tracks. A girl stepped out from behind a tree holding a bow with another arrow nocked .

“And where might you be headed, Grace?” the girl asked. Jason recognized her as Kayla Knowles, daughter of Apollo and, of course, one of Will Solace’s half-siblings.

The son of Jupiter tried to respond, but no sound came out. With that, another child of Apollo, Austin Lake stepped in front of him. Austin gestured at Jason, and he found he could speak again.

“I...” he began, meaning to continue with “just wanted to chat with Will,” but what came out instead was (at top speed, and with a much better singing voice than he normally had):   
“am the very model of a modern Major-General,  
I've information vegetable, animal, and mineral,  
I know the kings of England, and I quote the fights historical  
From Marathon to Waterloo, in order categorical;”

“Gilbert and Sullivan, very nice,” remarked Kayla

“Thanks, sis,” Austin replied. Turning to Jason, he said, “You were going to give our brother the shovel speech, weren’t you?”

Jason only nodded, knowing that trying to talk would only result in more singing.

“We might not be able to call down lightning or summon a tidal wave,” Kayla continued, “but we can look after our own.” She emphasized her point by raising her bow so that the point of her arrow was aimed directly at Jason’s sternum.

“Also,” Austin broke in, “we have a shovel speech of our own. I won’t spell it out, but it concerns anyone thinking about coming between our beloved head counsellor and a certain son of Hades, who is also, by the way, an honorary member of Cabin Seven and therefore under our protection as well. I trust you and your friends will spread the word, when you can do it without singing, that is.”

Jason nodded again, backing slowly away from the glaring pair.

He came back to his cabin, where Piper greeted him with “How did it go?”

He only shook his head.

Without a trace of sympathy, Piper said, “Austin hit you with a curse, didn’t he?”

A nod this time.

“Too bad. Well it’s dinner time, so let’s walk over with Percy and Annabeth.”

When the couples met up, the two girls fell to chatting, but the boys were silent. As they entered the dining pavilion, Piper, with a look of sheer evil on her face, said to Annabeth, “Your boyfriend’s been rather quiet this evening.” 

Annabeth did not respond, but turned suddenly and jabbed Percy in the ribs as hard as she could. Instead of a yelp, he launched into a clear, ringing soprano, audible to most of the crowd gathered for dinner:  
“L’amour est un oiseau rebelle  
Que nul ne peut apprivoiser,  
Et c’est bien in vain qu’on l’appelle  
S’il lui convient de refuser.” 

As the son of Poseidon looked at his grey-eyed girlfriend resentfully, Piper asked, “Shovel speech?” Annabeth nodded and turned to give a thumbs up to Austin, who had entered with the members of the Apollo cabin, as well as one smiling member of the Hades cabin, who nudged Austin and said, “I do enjoy Carmen, but how about some Italian opera next time?”


	2. Reyna's Verse

Austin and Kayla were feeling rather smug. They’d put both Jason and Percy in their place, they’d preserved the honor of Cabin Seven, and they’d even gotten a smile out of Nico. They’d come to love their brother’s boyfriend, but he could be kind of somber at times, and after all he’d been through, the kid deserved to be happy. Humiliating (just a little bit) the other two sons of the Big Three seemed to bring a grin to their “adopted” cabin mate’s face, so all in all, the two Apollo campers felt that they had done well.

Their self-congratulation was interrupted when a large silver greyhound leapt onto Austin, pinning him to the ground. Before Kayla could draw her bow to defend her brother, a matching gold greyhound was on top of her.

“Aurem, Argentum, good work!” That was Reyna Avila Ramirez-Arellano, first Praetor of New Rome. Neither Kayla nor Austin dared to speak with the two metallic dogs holding them down, but they looked up at the praetor nervously.

“It has come to my attention that you two have decided to defend your brother against shovel speeches. Well, I have a shovel speech of my own, but it is not for Will Solace. As you know, Nico and I have been through an ordeal that has made us very close. Because of that, Nico’s happiness is very important to me, and as far as I can see, your brother is just what he needs to be happy. Now, I have duties that prevent me from seeing to it that nothing interferes with this, but as far as I can tell, you two are just the ones I can delegate this task to.” 

With that, Reyna gestured, and the two dogs released their captives. She extended a hand to each of them so that they could get up. As they rose, she put an arm around each of their shoulders in a way that could appear comradely if not for the steel in her grip and the fierceness of her gaze.

“Regarding the shovel speech,” she continued, “as I mentioned, it’s not for your brother. It’s for you. As I said, I’m quite willing to delegate this duty to you, but understand that if I find you shirking your duty, my dogs are just the beginning of what i’ll be visiting on you. Also know that Hazel has offered to back me up on this, and I think you know better than to cross a child of the Underworld. Are we clear?”

Kayla swallowed nervously and said, “Perfectly.”

Reyna loosened her grip and allowed a small smile to show up on her face. “Ah, Austin, when Nico told me about what you did to his cousins, he did mention one thing that I think you can help me with…”

======

Nico was pleasantly surprised when his friend Reyna showed up at the Camp Half Blood dining pavilion. He hurried toward her, calling out a greeting, but the smile on his face was replaced by a look of horror when Austin stepped out from behind her, producing a flute, which he used to accompany her as she began to sing in a rather surprising baritone:

Largo al factotum della città.  
Presto a bottega che l'alba è già.  
Ah, che bel vivere, che bel piacere  
per un barbiere di qualità!

Ah, bravo Figaro! Bravo, bravissimo!  
Fortunatissimo per verità!

Pronto a far tutto, la notte e il giorno  
sempre d'intorno in giro sta.  
Miglior cuccagna per un barbiere,  
vita più nobile, no, non si da.

Rasori e pettini, lancette e forbici,  
al mio comando tutto qui sta.  
V'è la risorsa, poi, del mestiere  
colla donnetta... col cavaliere...

Tutti mi chiedono, tutti mi vogliono,  
donne, ragazzi, vecchi, fanciulle:  
Qua la parrucca... Presto la barba...  
Qua la sanguigna... Presto il biglietto...  
Figaro! Figaro! Figaro!

Nico turned bright red and buried his face in his hands, stammering out, “Kayla...Austin...you didn’t...you couldn’t...oh gods...Reyna! I’m so sorry…”

His babbling was interrupted when Will put one arm on his boyfriend’s shoulder and used his other hand to draw Nico’s face up so that he could see Reyna grinning and high-fiving Austin and Kayla as she said, “I thought you said you wanted some Italian opera.”


End file.
